I’m in grief writing this. My tears are falling freely on my cheek and I couldn’t fake or even control them. It’s dreadful. A doom closure of what we had. For the past two months that we’re together, I never thought that we would end up tossing awful words. I’m not crying because I want you to stay. These tears represent how hurt I am that I want to smash your face. I’m so damn hurt…drained….upset. I wanna go somewhere where I could just breakdown and cry once and for all. This is not the way it should be. This isn’t what I want. I built my world with you ‘coz I thought you’re different. But you’re just like the rest…WORTHLESS! I’ve been true and roughly gave my all. I did my fair share. But why it should end up like this? It’s so unfair! Would it help if I just let myself drift into tears? Hell yah, no! You don’t deserve my tears. It’s absurd. I maybe so empty and feeling helpless, but I don’t want to hide on your shadows.
“I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain from my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry”
It ain’t easy. I’m so stupid and insane. But with all that I am, I’m not asking you to stay. This is what you want. I’ll never stand in your way ‘coz I wanna be free more than you do. I’ll be okay and I assure you that. If someday our paths would cross, I’ll just deal with it as if I don’t know you at all.
Sooner or later, I’ll be okay…I’m gonna be okay.
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